Dying To Ask

’Growing Up In Public’ With Author Dr. Devorah Heitner

Growing up on the internet may not be as bad as we thought.

The first generation of kids exposed to a fully digital childhood is coming of age.

Their childhoods have been radically different than their parents' childhoods.

That's led a lot of parents to instinctively want to control kids' access to things like screen time and social media by installing limits and trackers on phones.

It's like a digital tug-of-war between parent and child with sometimes unintended consequences.

Dr. Devorah Heitner is an expert in all things family and tech and she has spent years looking at the impact of screens on kids.

Her new book, Growing Up in Public, examines the good and bad about growing up in a digital world.

Her message is non-judgmental and in many ways, she's more positive about teen screen exposure than their parents are.

In fact, a lot of teens are expressing frustration with their parents after, in some cases, discovering how much of their childhood was shared on social media.

Heitner says parents often express frustration with how much their kids share online. But, in her experience, kids often have a better grasp of online privacy than kids do.

Heitner says, "I have met so many kids who are so embarrassed by things that their parents are posting. When I go into schools, I'll ask kids to step in a circle if their friends have posted something that's embarrassing, and about half the kids will step in. Then, if I say step in if your parents have ever posted something embarrassing, and 100% of the kids will step into the circle."

On this Dying to Ask:

• What it's like to grow up in public.
• Why Heitner emphasizes mentoring over monitoring.
• Two things parents should do before posting about their kids on social media.
• A warning for schools and families when it comes to education apps that track assignments and grades.
• Why Heitner isn't a fan of tracking apps like Life 360.

4 Habits To Set Your kid (And Yourself) Up For School Success

It's back to school time and that means back to anxiety for a lot of families. But four easy tips could lessen stress for kids and parents.

Jenn Curtis is an educational consultant, the founder of FutureWise, and co-author of "The Parent Compass." She says back to school stress is normal. But, going into the school year with a plan can help.

The school year is a natural reset for families and a great time to shake up habits, both in and out of the classroom.

Jenn has four tips to help improve academic success for kids. The funny thing? Those tips are applicable to all ages!

It starts with setting out some goals and then setting your kids (and yourself) up for success.

On this Dying to Ask:

• How to set goals with your kids for the school year
• Why you need a "family meeting" at the start of the year
• How to form a "what if" plan in case kids run into trouble academically
• 4 tips to set your kid (and yourself) up for success this school year

Can you be successful without social media?

Making a mark without leaving a digital footprint. It's tough to do, but debut novelist Elizabeth Castellano is pulling it off.

Elizabeth, or Liz as she goes by, is the author of "Save What's Left."

In a field where a strong digital footprint is often a predictor of professional success, Liz is defying the odds.

Her book is one of the most buzzed-about titles this summer. People Magazine called it one of the best books of the summer.

You can credit a lot of things for Liz's success, but a strong social media presence isn't one of them.

Liz has a three-line bio on her website and doesn't do social media.

"I got off social media a couple of years after college. I just decided not for me. I don't like it. I think there's more harm than good. I just felt better being off of it, and so it just stuck, and you do miss things," says Liz.

On this 'Dying to Ask':

• What pushed Liz off social media, and how that impacted her mental health and creativity.
• How unusual it is for a "creative" not to use social media to promote a product.
• What it's like to be an "overnight success."

Other places to listen

CLICK HERE to listen on iTunes
CLICK HERE to listen on Stitcher

Seeing A Gold Medal Moment In The 1-Year Countdown To The 2024 Paris Olympics

Been there, done that. I've never been so glad to say that covering a one-year countdown to an Olympics.

It's been a few years since that milestone didn't involve significant talk about the pandemic.

This year felt, dare I say it, normal.

I had that realization while doing an interview with 2008 Olympic Gold Medalist Gabe Gardner. I covered Gardner's golden moment in Beijing and we've been friends ever since. Gabe is still active with Team USA. He's worked as an athlete liaison and Board Member for the United States Olympic and Paralympic Endowment.

Gabe is one of my go-to interviews as we hit the one-year mark to an Olympics. In the last couple of Olympics, we've focused on pandemic protocols, masking, testing and all things COVID-19.

This year, we talked about the fun stuff. It was deliciously normal. And we both remarked after the interview that it felt good to get back to something we'd done before. Been there, done that.

On this Dying to Ask:

• A challenge to all of us to recognize and appreciate these moments as they come up post-pandemic
• And I'll play the full Q&A I did with Gabe with his thoughts on the one-year countdown to the 2024 Paris Summer Olympics.

College Organizing 101 With Kim Salisbury

Three words: less is more. That's the advice from professional organizer Kim Salisbury of Home Method Co when it comes to packing up and moving into a college dorm room.

Kim has helped families organize college dorms for years. This year, she'll take her own advice when her oldest child heads to college this fall.

"The most important thing that I can say is, don't bring too much, because that's what we have found. That's happening over and over again. You don't need to, much less is more," Salisbury said.

Easier said than done. But, studies show an organized living space is key to focus, productivity and happiness. Creating a welcoming and simplified space can go a long way in boosting mental health.

See the full top 10 list of must-have dorm items on Kim's blog.

And listen to this week's conversation with Kim goes over what to pack while unpacking the complex emotions parents feel when their kids leave the nest.

On this Dying to Ask:

• What to pack and what *not to pack
• The most overrated thing kids put on their beds
• A paperwork checklist before you even step foot on the campus
• The inexpensive space saver parents might want to add to their bedrooms

5 Areas To Declutter To Destress With Kim Salisbury

Want to feel less stressed? Try cleaning out your junk drawer.

Decluttering may be the simplest path to destressing.

Research has shown eliminating unneeded or unused things and organizing is good for focus, self esteem and mood.

You can actually lower your cortisol stress hormone by purging areas in your home, especially the places where you spend the most time.

Professional organizer Kim Salisbury is the owner of Home Method Co. She studied psychology in college. And, she says she uses the psychology background every day in her work helping families clear the clutter.

"When you are living in spaces that are calm and organized, it brings your blood pressure down, it brings your anxiety down. It brings your stress level down," says Kim.

Kim says the goal is to make your home feel like a sanctuary and it doesn't have to take a lot of time or money to make it happen.

Do you geek out on all things organization? Check out Kim's blog here. 

On this Dying to Ask:

• How Kim became a professional organizer.
• The mental health benefits of decluttering your space.
• How negative space impacts your mood.
• The room you need vertical space in.
• And the top five spaces you should declutter first.

 

Other places to listen

CLICK HERE to listen on iTunes
CLICK HERE to listen on Stitcher

How To Start A Side Hustle With Frank Vella

Need cash? Maybe you need a side hustle.

Inflation has a lot of people looking for ways to bring in more money.

Getting a raise in the job you have now is likely not an option. But adding a part time job might be.

Small business startups aka "side hustles" tend to boom during very specific times.

Tightening job markets, recessions, and inflation inspire fiscal creativity. But it's not always about the money.

Sometimes people road-test a new career by starting a side hustle.

Sometimes people just want something fun to do in their free time!

But how do you maximize money while limiting the additional work hours?

You need a plan and today's guest has some great advice.

Frank Vella is the CEO of the marketing platform Constant Contact.

Frank says new entrepreneurs often run into the same problem.

"My advice to the small business owner is do what you do well and leverage tools to to get done what you don't have time or don't do well," says Vella.

In other words, be realistic.

On this Dying to Ask:

• How to find a side hustle.
• How to launch your new gig.
• Some Business 101 advice, the do's and don'ts of a small business.
• Why the greatest gift of your side
• And Frank and Fitz even talk parenting.

How To Know When It’s Time To Quit Your Job With Jaclyn Goldis

From big law to big adventure to big-time author. Jaclyn Goldis' new book is called "The Chateau" and the thriller is topping summer beach reads lists.

But Jacyln's personal story has some interesting chapters too. And it starts with quitting a prestigious and lucrative job.

She quit her job in Chicago as an estate planning lawyer right to travel the world. And, she quit that job after seven and a half years, right around the time most attorneys make partner.

The decision was met with a 50/50 reaction from friends and colleagues.

She brought two small backpacks and the hope that she could realize her dream of life as a fiction writer.

It worked. The trip unlocked creativity and fueled her soul in a way her more linear career path was not.

Seven years later, she's settled in Tel Aviv, Israel, lives two blocks from the beach and is living a lifelong dream because she took a chance.

"I had so many fears of how it was going to work and where it was going to end up, and how the writing thing was going to go. And you know, there were a lot of stress in terms of that. But ultimately, I'm so happy I took that risk and I'm really happy where I ended up," Goldis said.

On this Dying to Ask:

• How Jaclyn knew to trust her gut and quit her lawyer job.
• What her colleagues said when she left law right around the time she was about to make partner
• A reality check on what quitting a job and traveling the world as a single adult is really like.
• What did she pack in the two small backpacks on her trip around the world?
• Where Jaclyn ultimately ended up settling and what her new life as a buzzed-about author is like.
• The quote that guides her life.

It’s Time For A Mid-Year Reset

How's that New Year's resolution going for you? Yeah, me too. Maybe we need a summer reset.

It's like a resolution do-over so your future self doesn't have to be irritated by your past self and your current self can lose some anxiety. It's very meta.

80% of New Year's goals or resolutions are a memory by mid-February.

Only one in 10 people will follow through for a solid year on a resolution.

On this Dying to Ask:

• Why you might be able to blame the weather for tanking your New Year's goals
• 3 reasons why a summer reset makes a lot of sense
• How to re-frame how you look at the calendar in goal setting

Need a new podcast to binge? Here's a link to Scamanda, which I mention on the show.

The Big Benefits Of Little Luxuries

The "Dying to Ask" podcast is marking its 200th episode in a most luxurious way.

We're talking about how simple luxuries can have a big impact on your mood and mindset. Think cheap and easy. This is not a heavy lift.

My colleague and dear friend Edie Lambert joins me as co-host.

Both Edie and I are huge fans of the Happier with Gretchen Rubin podcast. Rubin is the best-selling author of The Happiness Project. A few months ago, she published an episode highlighting the value small luxuries have in daily life.

Edie and I loved it and did a deep dive into the little things we do to make a tough day feel a little less horrid. And we each asked our Facebook communities to weigh in too. The result is this episode.

And this is the "Dying to Ask" podcast's 200th episode! This show starts with a quick discussion of how podcasting has changed since our debut and answers a few questions listeners have asked about the success of "Dying to Ask." Thinking about starting a podcast? You're not alone, and the info may give you insight into the podcasting industry before you get started.

Back to luxuries.....

On this 'Dying to Ask':

• The big impact of small luxuries.
• We share KCRA viewers' suggestions on little things that make their lives feel fancy.
• And Edie and I share 10 of our small luxuries.